Dear Postman Pat

Dear Postman Pat,

I am writing to inform you that you are required to attend a disciplinary hearing on Tuesday 3 April 2018. This hearing will be held at 11am in the back office of the Greendale Post Office.

During this hearing, we will discuss your alleged misconduct in your current role as postman. For avoidance of doubt, the allegations which we will be discussing are as outlined below:

1) Your repeated and persistent breach of our Animals at Work policy

2) Your repeated and persistent misuse of Post Office vehicles for personal use, including not only your postal van but also the Special Delivery helicopter

3) The repeated reports and allegations that you do not in fact spend the entirety of your working day delivering mail, but in fact spend a large percentage of your paid working time drinking tea, visiting friends, and becoming derailed into various village escapades

4) Your utter ineptness when it comes to handling almost all items of mail

5) The repeated reports of breakages and damages to fragile items of post

6) The repeated late delivery of mail

7) Your inappropriate fraternisation with key members of the village community

8 ) Your inappropriate carriage of minors and livestock in vehicles belonging to the Post Office

9) Your misuse of a mobile phone while in control of vehicles belonging to the Post Office

10) Your general inability to carry out even the most basic elements of your job role

Despite your length of service, you should be aware that the severity and number of the above allegations means that these have the potential to be classed as Gross Misconduct. As a result, the possible outcomes of this hearing are as follows:

*No further action
*Written warning
*Final written warning
*Summary dismissal (without notice or payment in lieu of notice)

You are entitled to be accompanied by a colleague or trade union representative at this hearing. For avoidance of doubt, “colleague or trade union representative” does not include Ted Glen, Mrs Goggins, or Jess the Cat.

Yours sincerely,

Greendale Post Office HR Department

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